Becoming a mother, whether it’s your first or fourth, can be an overwhelming process. There are a lot of emotions like love, fear, joy, and anxiety topped off with the ever present lack of sleep. The first several months and sometimes years are spent caring for another little human.
It’s not that caring for your child is a bad thing in any way. However, it’s important that there is a healthy balance between caring for your baby, family, and yourself. If you’re not happy and healthy, it can have an impact on everyone else in the family, even the tiny little one. Happy mom equals a happy baby.
Accept Offered Help
As a new parent or an old parent to a new baby, it’s easy to feel like you want to be the one who does everything for the baby. This is completely natural, but depending on your support network it can quickly become overwhelming. That being said, it’s good to accept help offered from those you trust. That doesn’t mean it has to be another person caring for your little one as a nanny. It can be babysitting while you soak in the tub or take a nap. Maybe someone has offered to help with laundry or dishes, there is no shame in accepting help.
Moms want to know they have control over situations. Oftentimes, our close friends and family want to help, but they are unsure of what you need. Help yourself by accepting their offer to help and delegate what tasks they could do to lend a hand. If the dishes have you in a frenzy, delegate that as a primary task. Cleaning and shopping can seem like an overwhelming chore when you have a baby to care for.
Let It Go
Parenting books and magazines offer a wealth of helpful advice, but that doesn’t mean that it’s right for you and your newborn baby. Putting your baby on a schedule is one of the most common tips and, truthfully, that can become more stressful than helpful. Yes, a schedule is beneficial for everyone involved, but it doesn’t have to be strict. Instead, shoot for a flexible routine that involves general expectations such as feeding and nap times. Don’t let it get to you if the schedule doesn’t get followed to the letter because life with little ones can be rather spontaneous and unexpected. Let it go and go with the flow.
Trust In Your Spouse
As moms, we have a fairly clear idea of how things should be done with our baby. Sometimes dads think a little differently, and that’s ok. Some women are driven crazy by the difference in opinion or processes, which causes us to want to do it ALL ourselves. That isn’t the best idea. It’s good to give dad a chance to have their own experiences. They will either learn why you do things the way you do or they might have an easier way of doing things that you may have never considered. Let them help and let them learn just as you did being a mom. If you push them away from helping too often it can cause them to shy away, potentially risking a father-child relationship.
A happy mama helps make a happy baby. Let go of the unexpected guilt that surfaces when the baby is with a sitter. Don’t take on so much that you’re constantly overwhelmed, stressed and unhappy. Your baby might be new to the world but they pick up on things and it can cause a rift in their little life. You’re doing great!